I'm Not Who I was!

Dear God,

The beginning of this year I found myself in a new city away from things that were familiar to me. We knew it was Your will to move up here, but I honestly found myself very upset, angry, depressed, and disappointed. How could You take us away from our family, our friends, our house, our church, my ability to work using my college degree? As I spent some ugly time rolling around in those "why" questions and making myself miserable, You in all your amazing grace kept whispering to my heart, and in the moment of me being still, and listening I heard you say, "Nichole I had to take those things away so that I could give you more of Me" ‘Wow, You really do know me don’t You?’ Early on this year You crossed my path with a sweet girl from the south, who said Your words to my heart, "Nichole when I got to see the real you I knew I would like getting to know you." Yes she said those words, but I knew they were straight from Your heart! It is the message You have whispered to my heart from the day You captured it! "Be the one I created you to be!" Thank You for giving me such an amazing gift in the month of February, You unwrapped a gift that You had actually given to me many years ago, the dream of speaking, and re-presented with the right purpose, speaking for You! For You have spent this year dancing with me in fields of grace. A grace that is so needed in my daily life as wife, mom, daughter, friend and sister. Teaching me how to live. How to live every moment and take my steps intentionally. Giving me Your eyes so that I can see those around me how You do. Then nudging me and saying…’go ahead and love all over them’. A love that really isn’t me, no its just the overflow from You! And did I tell You just how much it tickles me to see You love on people? You are amazing! I did many things out of obedience. An obedience that didn’t look or sound so pretty many times. Which makes me stand back in awe that You are that good to work through my feeble attempt at obedience. Oh and in the process learned that it is all in Your beautiful design of just how a relationship with You flows. From obedience I learned that respect, patience, love, endurance, perseverance, commitment, and submission will be woven in at just the right times…thank You! I fell down quite a few times, with the skinned knees came tears, pride removal, honesty, and obedience. Thank You for each one of these times. Thank You for not taking me out of any of the circumstances of this past year. Thank You for holding my hand, wiping my tears, and whispering to my heart, "there is purpose even in this." Thank You for blessing me with the most amazing man, the most loving two little boys, and a network of family and friends that allow You to use them. Thank You for friends I have made over this past year via this blog that You created and You orchestrate. Friends who You are doing some amazing things through. You are helping them to fight for their lives, run their homes, and spread Your love. Thank You for the blessing of each person I have met through this blog, because it is an opportunity to see You work!

Lord that I can say at the end of this year, "I am not who I was!"

Thank You for loving me so much that You make everything around me about You!

On Purpose,

Nichole


And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28